Tuesday, April 13, 2010

January 2004... Feedback from a Client

January 2004

After considerable deliberation and several attempts at putting into words what is most important about what I have experienced with Neil’s guidance, the results are as follows.

Because, even though I am aware of it, I have not let go of all areas of my control and organization issues, I have categorized the “Most Important(s).”

The Most Important Moments

The Most Important Lessons

The Most Important Knowledge Gained

# 1 overall Most Important

Most Important Moments

What I remember as the first remarkable moment of importance was when, after a particularly challenging session with Neil, the fog of fear and clouds of confusion shifted and I had a glimpse of endless blue sky, felt the warmth of radiant sunshine and experienced a moment of incredible peace. Even 10 seconds in this state, made all the painful, emotional work, the struggling to see with closed eyes, the fearful moments of recollection - worthwhile. Even when the next step into a downpour of cold, stinging, wet conditions reminded me that there is so much more intense work to do, I could clearly recall those seconds of sweet blissful serenity and I knew I could, and would experience it again.

Most Important Moments

There was a time in my recovery {only one he asks?} that I thought I could handle something that is strongly suggested to avoid at that particular place in one’s healing. I had let myself be part of a relationship and in typical fashion; I let myself think I could run, when in fact I was barely crawling. Therefore, when it was halted very suddenly, I was devastated. I was sitting at the dining room table crying hysterically, my entire body vibrating as though in seizure, unable to draw a breath of air. At this point the person with whom I had been involved, stood up, turned out the light and walk away from me quietly leaving by the front door. This, of course, doubled the already impossible amount of devastation I was feeling. A mille-second before the point of passing out, due to the inability to draw air into my lungs, I became still and very much aware of a sensation like a hand touching my head ever so gently. In that instant, calmness replaced the hysteria and I knew I was not alone.

An interesting note:

I am presently working once again, on the “With” part of my healing and encountering a resistance. I have not recalled the moment of which I just spoke for about five years. I was pondering the subject of “Most Important” then set it aside to return my attention to the challenging subject of “With” . In the split second between the two bodies of work, the memory of that feeling of being touched by the Hand of God presented it’s self like an oasis in the middle of a dessert. As Neil would say Imagine That!

Most Important Lessons

Without a doubt, one of the most valued lessons I learned from my sessions with Neil, is how to clear the storage shelves in that “old back shed” of my mind. There was stuff there that I had been saving as long as 40 years. And by the time I learned how to deal with this stuff the selves were just about collapsing. The process of going back and remembering, then looking at and feeling the item, followed by seeing the affects it’s had on my life was monumental. But when the light of understanding switches on and I can track how the path of the issue influenced and directed my path, the ability to discard the burden and alter the power I permitted it to hold over me is liberating.

The same applies to things told to me by the people I listened to as a child. Some of those teachings do not apply to me today {and in some cases did not or should not have applied to me back then}. By tracing the origin and observing its affect, I can re-assess its value and decide whether or not it is healthy for me now. This process facilitates change. And change is good!

The Most Important Knowledge Gained

• Guilt, Regret, Deceit and hate {fear}cause “dis-ease"
• We cannot change the past.
• Our lives are just as they are meant to be.
• Surrendering to our Higher Power is Liberating.

The #1 overall Most Important is…….

I accept that every aspect and event of my life occurs as a necessary part of a bigger plan about which I do not, cannot and do not need to know or understand.
It is not good or bad, right or wrong.

It simply is!~

January 2004

There's more............

There's more..............

After writing, re-writing, reading, re-reading, printing and re-printing and another reading I have a few truths to tell you.

1 - I wrote this in the manner I did because I think I’m good at writing, I like to put it out there and hopefully someone will critique it.

2 - I am trying to please you.

3 - I’m not entirely sure I know what is most important to me, but these things have made a remarkable difference in my life.



NDT: this came via email . in January of 2004 ...

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