Tuesday, June 25, 2013
On Seeing Clearly And Taking Action
EXPERIENCE has taught us that each of us is in some way obsessed with self-improvement: trying to be better, always trying to have more, trying to be fixed, trying to help either ourselves or someone else; trying to appear different. There are hundreds of variations on this theme; some are very misleading and can be quite confusing if we take them only at face value.
Frequently, we use those scripts and beliefs to trick ourselves into believing that all is well in our world, often in spite of overwhelming evidence that it is not.
If we ever stopped to examine the reality of it all, we might just notice that things are not so good.
Things I have learned:
There are a few things that I have learned on this journey and one important one is, Awakening is Not Analyzing … or … Analyzing is Not Awakening … this one confused me for some time … I thought that if I knew, then I would know and if I was in a place of knowing then all would be fine in my world …
The problem with that is that I never got this theory on knowing to work all that well … but lord knows I tried …
I basically tried every variation on a theme …
I analyzed for the sake of analyzing … I analyzed the analysis … I look closely at my waking state and I analyzed what it was that I thought I did to keep me from being fully awakened into my world … whatever that meant … and understanding it … all at the same time.
What I discovered was Awakening is Awakening … and it has nothing to do with my understanding of it … oh there is an understanding that comes with it … but understanding will not bring it on ... no matter how hard I tried to make it work for me in that fashion …
Working mis-Definition of Freedom and Happiness:
What most people call freedom is simply their willful ability to satisfy their desires. The call of I want more freedom, is the hue and cry of the false self’s need to fill an emptiness it senses within itself and has no idea how to fill.
What I have come to understand about the statement: I want more freedom is; I want to be able to have more of what I want, when I want it, and in the fashion that I believe I want to have it in.
From both my practice and my own practices I have to argue that the process of wanting what you want as often as you want it … More … is not freedom, it is in fact a kind of compulsion that keeps one hooked into the delusion that more is better, or more is best, or more defines wellness; when in fact, it is truly the defining quality of our discomfort in the first place. The very thing that more was supposed to remove is defined by the need for more.
Circuitous and puzzling all at the same time because the very thing that we are taught is the answer to the conundrum is in fact what is driving the conundrum to continue endlessly.
A Working Definition Of Freedom can be summed up as:
Being able to have or not have what you want, without being lost in the drama of what appears to be happening in the unfolding process of having or not having. Thus not having to react to life and life’s situations and defending yourself from the experience you are trying to have.
Life does not have to be a Polar Bear Dancing Lesson
Wednesday, June 19, 2013
On Seeing Clearly ¾
EXPERIENCE has taught us that it (our experience) is both mindful and healing, and that we must attempt this ongoing experiment. It clearly demonstrates a willingness on our behalf to want to experiment with, and to want to enter into, an experience that might allow a fuller, more open relationship with a Higher Power.
The exercise is one example of “demonstrated willingness.”
It has many faces and has been presented many times in many forms. It is an understatement to say that this exercise tends to pit the ego against the Will of God, because that is exactly what it does, and that is the idea of the exercise.
The exercise is simple enough, some may say too simple, but most find it to be work, and most have difficulty completing the exercise.
Here are the rules:
You may elect not to actually try this experiment, but if you do decide to experiment, then all that is required is simply imagining what it would feel like for you to thoroughly believe five simple statements. The exercise is this: simply affirm, several times a day, day after day, for six months, the following statements, imagining the full meaning of each statement to the fullest extent possible for you at the time:
i. I am not separate. I am one with All that Is, All that Was, and All that Ever Will Be.
ii. I can trust.
iii. I can know.
iv. I am responsible.
v. I am single-minded.
Wednesday, June 12, 2013
On Seeing Clearly Simple Truths
EXPERIENCE has taught us that if we have released our pain and faced our fears, searched out and exorcised our demons, then it is important that we know enough to let them go … leave them alone after that. Don’t go back and play with them. They are not entrails to be gone through, they are not a part of our identity, they are not who we are, they are simply manifestations of what happened to us.
So many of us treat this process as if it were once dirty laundry but now is clean, so we go out and gather it all back up, thinking we’ve found some lost possessions that need to come home.
They are not. They are simply the by-products of what happened. They're history let them go.
They are to be left at the side of the road for our Higher Power to pick up and use or discard as It pleases.
So here I sit, still exhausted but clearer of mind.
I have decided deep within me that I am ready.
I have decided is the key phrase.
I am ready to let go of all this stuff, all this mess.
I close my eyes and I pray, probably for the first time in my life, I sincerely pray to my Higher Power and simply ask, “Take all this from me.”
I sense the presence of that Voice again. It is here with me now, beside me and silent. I can feel it, I can’t hear it, I can just feel its presence.
Then I hear.
You have no burden to remove. I did not error in your creation. You are perfect, as are all my creations. You are made in my image. I, as your maker, see only that, you are perfect in my creation, which is all there is to see for either you or me.
So I instruct you: You made your burden; you set it down; now, walk away from it.
Simply leave “ It All” by the side of the path. I will come in my own good time pick it up and put it to its proper use elsewhere in My Creation. Simply go and leave it there for Me to pick up … whenever … later.
For the first time ever in my life I know absolutely that I am not alone.
Others have stopped and they take me by my hand and we walk together toward our future.
The future Our Creator intended for us to have.
Experience Has Taught Me That
I Am No Longer At Odds With Everything . . . I Am Free
I Am Free To Be as God Created Me
Wednesday, June 5, 2013
On Seeing Clearly Perhaps for the First Time―What’s Next and Why it is Next
EXPERIENCE has taught us that, unfortunately, the drama and trauma of life happened to us far too soon. Those who were supposed to protect us either could not or did not. Life’s pot got stirred at precisely the wrong moment; our impetuous newborn souls froze up in fear, and now hold on tight to anything they can, demanding that life come to them rather than that they go to life.
Stalled in the spiritual birth canal.
Demanding ever more and more; the content changing, but the form always staying the same.
Give me. Give me right now.
I don’t care what it is, just give me so I got it.
Give me so I can feel safe.
I’m not going out there after it; give it to me right here and now.
Confusion and fear … my ever-faithful traveling companions … arise yet again to do their handy work.
I begin by questioning life and all that is about me … and as I have noticed … at the time of my asking these deeper questions … they are seemingly real to me … but in hindsight I can see now that they were in no way connected to me either finding or seeing the truth.
Truth, I pondered that recently …
· Does my search for it actually get in the way of my attempts at finding it?
· Do my best efforts hold me back from what it is that I say I want?
I have gone over and over my history … my story … my past … in a vain attempt to be able to say out loud to anyone who would listen that I now … egotistically … understand … so I can say “I know” … as an aside I discovered that can be a dangerous thing to do …
I have noticed that as I did this review of my life thing in my mind I tended to edit and revise my story just to better suit it to the condition of my circumstances … help me explain the unexplainable … those things that I did that I can’t seem to find the courage to take responsibility for … to make a better story … to explain why it is that I do what it is that I do or did what I did … etc.
If I were being honest I would notice that I am secretly striving for control …
There it is … I said it out loud … is that Honesty?
Insatiable, needy, scared, loving, and friendly?
All in the same thought.
For Your Journal: In Longhand
Faith to me means: Page and a half to two full pages longhand please …