Friday, August 12, 2016

25 Zen and the Art of Lost & Found

Zen and the Art of Lost & Found

Defining the Problem

We tend to carry unresolved and hidden childhood and family issues into our adult life … workplaces or relationships or family matters. 
In fact we re-enact the roles of our family in just about everything that we do. 
The ability to identify these roles and their primary characteristics that family members adapt to and eventually become … will be of primary importance in the treatment of the family system in dysfunction.  Definitions may vary for the term "co-dependent" depending on the philosophical orientation of the writer … similarly for terms such as "enabler" or "co-addict". 

Roles, Roles[1]

As an example: the children of the co- dependent family system tend to assume the following roles to survive within the family system.
q  These roles can and do overlap
q  They change, and it is good to know that the ones listed here are only the umbrella groupings of the roles we play … there are many more. 
q  The present day origins of our roles lay in the ashes of the residuals of all the past and different roles we played in our families systems just to survive being a kid at our house. 
q  Our job if we want to heal is to look and go back and look at our families and the roles that everyone had and to rework our roles.

A.     The Hero Role 

B.     The Martyr Role 

C.     The Pleaser Role 

D.    The Parent Role. 

E.     The Good-Guy Or Gal Role 

F.     The Rebel Role 

G.    The Lost Child Role 

H.    The Extension Of Parent Role 

I.       The Mediator Role 

J.      The Clown, Mascot Or Entertainer Role   

K.    The Charmer Role 

L.     The Victim Role 

M.   The Offender Role 

N.    The Enabling Role 

O.    The Addict Role 

P.     The Scapegoat Role 

Q.    The Organizer Role 

R.    The Healer Role 

            The Jeremiah Or Prophet Role 

Avoid Negativity at all cost … Negative = Bad.

S.     The Queen Bee Role 
T.     The Gadfly Role 
U.    The Odd-Duck Role 

[1] Whitefield, Charles MD  … Codependency /Healing the Human Condition … published by Health Communications Inc Deerfield Beach Florida … 1991

No comments:

Post a Comment