Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Life’s Conundrum: How Do I Help Those Who Have Something That Repulses?
What I have found is that if I encourage those who seem to carry that which repulses to explore that very thing, the remedy is always held someplace deep in the exploration of their own pain, hurt and rejection. It really is in there someplace. They just have to find it. Another oddity is that, as they find the resolution, become comfortable with it, and are no longer overpowered by it, the issue seems to lose the quality of repulsion and they are no longer projecting that out onto the world.
No Longer At Odds With Everything
It is a truth that those who have little room for their own pain and cannot accept pain as a normal and natural part of their life, seldom, if ever, encourage others to enter directly into an experience with their feelings (which could promote a more intimate understanding of this feeling and thus soften the resistance to pain that the feeling engendered in the first place).
Resistance to pain only serves, in the long run, to enhance the pain. Thus, examining it in some depth can serve to relieve the pain.
"It isn't just the pain in my body that really hurts. It's all the pains of my life that I have to pull away from; that which has imprisoned me in my impression of how I think life should be. Beginning to see my feelings just as they are brings me to a point of recognizing just how little time I have given to having real feelings in my life, including my pain, both physical and psychological."
As they began to notice that they had never fully met themselves in life or dealt with these feelings or, for that matter, their own immortality (because they had always been encouraged to withdraw from what was predetermined to be unpleasant or painful and then labeled as bad or wrong) what they discovered was that the very thought of unpleasant acted as keeper of the keys. They were, in effect, their own jailer.