I spent some time at the Valley ... it was said in those days that you were at the Valley for a season ... it was one of the best times in my life ... have a look ... Neil
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ReG9Kd-caJM
It came about after a prolonged period of meditation, having the same image come up in my mind's eye over and over - A Closed Door in the middle of a giant hall. Someone said write about it and I did; hence this poetry and the concept, then 175 Missing Pieces and all the rest of the books on recovery and now workshops and seminars on spiritual recovery. Neil
Saturday, September 28, 2013
Peace
Peace does not
mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble, or hard work. Peace
means to be in the midst of all those things and still be calm in your heart ... from my friend Cleone
Thursday, September 19, 2013
Over and over, I have followed my own advice on what I think I should
do and how I think I should do it. Each time “It Came Up The Same”, I have failed.
There are times when the desperation inside of me becomes so
overwhelming; I don’t think I can go on for another moment.
But as I quiet my mind and close my eyes I notice, for the first time
in years, that there is a part of me that remembers the truth of whom I
am. It speaks to me in a voice that is
neither male nor female and reassures that all is not for naught.
Imagine that, from deep inside a Voice Of Sanity, a reassurance,
comfort and truth. This is a Voice that I recall from my childhood, soft and
certain, It reminds me of my Maker and It tells me I am part of all that
is. One with! I am part of the plan too
and I belong, no longer left out.
"No Child of God can be less than perfect."
There is warmth and a comfort that comes over me as I sense this
Presence deep within me. Oh, It is hard
to discern at first, but each time I acknowledge It to be alive and well within
me, I feel It grow and become more pronounced and defined, and more a part of
my life.
I feel the pieces of me beginning to come home from their hiding places
and take their rightful place within me.
The missing parts of me are beginning to fall into place, as if some
giant hand is now beginning to put me, the jigsaw puzzle, back together again.
Experience Has
Taught Me
That I know that I have many avenues open to me and it really is a
simple decision
A or B
Choose the new and unfamiliar, take the risks and begin to experiment
with something that I have discovered within me, something totally new and
unfamiliar
Or
Do it the old way and take one more step towards death.
Which will I choose?
“A Power Greater Than Me”
to me means:
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
The Metaphor
1
It has been my belief since my earliest memory that “I am alone and my
world is a dangerous place”.
My life seems to affirm this to me daily.
I have found that I can only acquire the relief and happiness that I
think I want by doing something, getting something and or consuming something.
There are times when I feel I am so desperate, lost and alone.
I have learned that when my best efforts fail me, I have gathered habits
along the way that I can depend on.
These habits are creations from outside of me and they are
"magical". They take their
form as substances, actions or facilities, things that I use daily just to get
by on.
I know that I can always reach out to them and rely on them. It is sad but true that these “magical”
chattels are my addictions, obsessions and/or compulsions.
As I still my thoughts and close my eyes, I begin to realize that I
have placed the scant shadow of my faith in a place and on activities that are
misbegotten.
I am beginning to admit to myself that my beliefs are not really
true. The various forms of my beliefs,
my addictions, obsessions and/or compulsions are devices that have only brought
me pain.
I am admitting that I have no control over them. In fact; I have given
them all my power.
I also notice that they have no power of their own.
They sit there like lifeless forms, shadows or ghosts, awaiting only
the wind of my restlessness to stir my soul and scatter them.
I admit that I have been insane and I wonder about what may lie before
me as I begin my journey toward finding the world of my sanity.
Experience Has Taught Me
That I am out of control
And
I know I am not happy.
I know that my beliefs have not and cannot make me happy.
I know I must find “different” to be happy.
Where will I look?
What will I see?
And who will help me?
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